Return from Pembroke

Jerome and I recently took (recently meaning we returned today) a weekend trip to Strasburg, VA.

While we were gone Xaye stayed with Nanny and G Pops for the weekend. I found myself smiling as Nanny reminded Pops and I that things would not go exactly as we want - and it helped me relax and enjoy our weekend retreat.

We laughed and talked about Xaye and his recent silliness as we drove to - and from - the retreat. We talked about being a family, about being parents, about being grateful. Xaye brings so much joy to my life. He challenges my patience, my creativity - my focus. I feel myself striving to be a better person in his presence.

I am grateful for the constant reminder of being mindful - and easily drawn back into our family world with a grin - his voice on my phone, and an invitation to play.

Xaye is doing a lot of imitating. Imitating Pop and I and how we interact with him. I appreciate that I find humor in his antics - and in my own voice coming from him. It is another tool that I find useful - and I have such respect for the safety we have in our relationship for him to say exactly what he wants to say.

Oh sure, I know you are thinking - he's 2. He doesn't have a filter. He doesn't realize he could be 'crossing a line'.
I think he does. He really knows how to read people - and he knows what is kind. He sees it in us - and when he doesn't, he lets us know.

It hurts a little everytime he lets me know if I am being unkind. At the same time, it is exactly what I have been asking for from my friends and family my whole life. I appreciate that this is the time in his life that he can offer it - and that it is also the time in my life when I can truly hear it.

Thanks Xaye.

Inside Joke? Inside Where?

I decided that it is imperative that I begin recording inside jokes about the relationships that Xaye has with myself and Pop.

Imperative.

First and foremost, laka.

Yes, I said it. and I don't mean latka. I mean...laka.

Laka is what we say RIGHT before we begin tickling. It has been for a long time. And he's 2. So a long time is pretty much his existence.

If Xaye doesn't want to be tickled, he will say so. Sometimes, he will yell "laka" and wait to be tickled.


I would also like to take this opportunity to document 'hi'.

This is what Xaye says when he is particularly impressed with himself. He just looks at you after accomplishing whatever it is he just accomplished. He pauses, smiles, and says "hi".

There isn't all that fluff - all that extemporaneous "look at me", "i did it", or "look what i can do" (which would horrify me, as I have seen to many episodes of MAD tv and the "Stuart skit" where the grown man acts like he is 5 and it is horribly creepy in a sick twisted funny kind of way).

We also have the infamous "have it" during which Xaye can be observed walking close enough to be out of reach and extending his arm to present his hand, which awaits said item. Sometimes he doesn't even walk towards you. He stands, legs stretched apart, straining his arm in your general direction. Classic.

Let's not forget a recent favorite, "cheese fish". This is a personal favorite. During dinner, he allows his cheese to impersonate a fish and there is a lot of "in the sky" and "jumping in" on behalf of the cheese with xaye as the narrator. Recently we were driving and Xaye mentioned the cheese fish. When I looked out the window I didn't see it. I pointed that out to Xaye, who quickly learned to respond "you missed it". Maybe next time. Also, there have been selected sightings of "spiderhorse" and "cheese dog". At this time, I have no physical evidence of their existence.

Oh, and then there is the "where is.... (insert item here)". It is amazing the size and expansiveness of items that can suddenly disappear and reappear. David Copperfield, step aside.
By the way, this also includes boats in the tub, which are completely invisible under the water.

Ok. No, i mean that. The next one is "ok". When Xaye completes a task, especially one that presented a challenge (zippers, closing a box), he expresses a satisfied "ok" as if to say "mission accomplished", and i imagine he has checked that item off of some list in his head.

Also, just this week "good job" reigns upon completion of a task - I think this is going to replace the aforementioned coy "hi" that was saved only for the expression of accomplishment.

anything chocolate looking is 'cake'. we are so screwed in the snack category. Snacks, you will be missed (or hidden, more likely. old habits die hard).



old inside jokes include:

slapping the inside of books when he opens them, and i look surprised. he giggles.
his chicken puppet being the most hilarious thing EVER.
the first time xaye saw a bus, he didn't have the word to describe it. so he improvised. "caaaaaaaar".

That's all for now. Tag, pop. Your it.

Candy Candy Candy